Northern Lakes Community Mental Health » Creative Thinking

Feeling Froggy!

Northern Lakes CMH — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 15:53:28 +0000

So the holidays are finally over and we can all take a deep breath in and out knowing that we have 11 more months until they start again (hardly seems like enough time does it?). I took a few minutes the other day while deciding what my New Years Resolution was, to write down all the accomplishments I have been through during this past year of 2011 (I was feeling froggy and took a jump on what I thought would be a positive affirmation of my year’s successes). I’d like to share some of those with you in hopes that, even if you have a bad day, if you create a list of your accomplishments for the entire year, you will surprise yourself at how many things you have done or overcome. My list has some of the following things on it:

Advocated for my daughter’s learning disability at her school until her curriculum was adjusted to meet her needs.
Got my youngest child (my three-year-old son) into a pre-primary intermediate school so he can start learning now versus later on how planned school days go and to help strengthen his language and vocabulary skills.
Spent more time with my father and mother than I have since I was a child.
Went back to college after an almost eight-year break.
Started reading at least one book a week if not more (that is non-college related and just something that sparks my interest).
Slowed down dramatically on smoking.
Updated my Wellness Recovery Action Plan (WRAP) and gave a new copy to my main supporters.
Emceed the Walk-A-Mile In my Shoes Rally at the state Capitol in Lansing, which was a huge honor to be asked and chosen.
Paid it forward and tried to help others who had helped me throughout the year, even with a kind hug or a warm smile.
Started giving my children a hug and a kiss every night before they went to bed and telling them I loved them – always making time to know that they are cared about and how proud I am to be their mom.

After I created this list (which is a lot longer than just these 10 things), I went back through it numerous times and in all actuality I kind of shocked myself at the many things I had accomplished in 365 days. It does not matter if you have only accomplished one thing in the past year, make sure to write it down and put it in the bathroom on the mirror where you can read it everyday and know you have done something to better your life or the lives of those around you. Be an advocate for yourself as well as others and remember to incorporate this as a daily celebration in your life. You are worth a lot and as an advocate even more!

Slowly resolving for a better course of life

Mary Beth Evans, Recovery Coordinator — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 10:33:38 +0000

Another year has flown by and many of us have already started thinking about what our New Year’s resolution should or will be. Resolutions help us reflect on the changes we want (or need) to make and how to follow through on those changes. Most of the time, we set resolutions and forget about them shortly thereafter. For me, I can say the reason I forget about them is merely from automatic habit (i.e., going through a drive through and ordering off the dollar menu because it’s cheap and quick instead of eating a salad brought from home). Personally speaking, I think that after the holidays are over, I try to not focus on new things but rather just try to relax from all the overwhelming things that have just occurred.

So what is a New Year’s Resolution?

I don’t think there is a definite answer to that question. There’s always going to be the regular resolutions to lose a certain amount of weight, stop smoking, eat healthier, and start exercising. But what if we make those resolutions and have a hard time following through with them? Should we feel like we have failed? Absolutely not! Take it from a not-so-perfect person that no one succeeds at things the first time they try. If they do, I stand corrected, but it is one hard task to follow; sticking to a resolution.

What if our goal is to lose 50 pounds by Christmas 2012? How can we make that a resolution and then get to that goal without forgetting we set it or not bothering to follow through with it in the first place? Small steps lead to bigger ones. Beginning by writing down a list of how you can lose 50 pounds is a simple effective way to start on that specific resolution. Using that list, make a monthly list of healthy meals you can make that are cost effective, use and stick to a shopping list, and figure out how to exercise for free at home instead of joining an expensive health club (soup cans work well to lift weight up and down). Check out this web-site for setting a budget, checking the sales, planning the menus, making a list, being a savvy shopper, etc. at http://www.chiff.com/cooking/budget-meals.htm

My main point is that anything is achievable if you want it to be. The New Year means a new start. However you want to start that year, try to keep the focus on what you want the ending goal to be for Christmas in 2012. Follow through slowly with your plan so that it is both easier to achieve as well as achievable at the same time. Do not set yourself up for failure and remember that changes come with time. You can do it. . . make a New Year’s Resolution and let us know about it here so we can brag about your successes. If you feel like you need help, put a comment up and get some peer support from people out there that might be struggling with the same things. Either way, do not give up and good luck!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

COOL FACT:

In the United States, the kiss shared at the stroke of midnight is derived from masked balls that have been common throughout history. As tradition has it, the masks symbolize evil spirits from the old year and the kiss is the purification into the New Year (http://ezinearticles.com/?The-History-of-New-Years-Resolutions&id=245213)

Healthy meals on a food stamp budget:

http://the-f-word.org/blog/index.php/2008/08/22/reader-challenge-healthy-meals-on-a-food-stamp-budget/

USDA Resource Library (meal planning, 10 steps to help you fill your grocery bag using SNAP benefits

http://snap.nal.usda.gov/nal_display/index.php?info_center=15&tax_level=4&tax_subject=261&topic_id=1243&level3_id=6213&level4_id=10046

101+ ways to save food dollars

http://snap.nal.usda.gov/nal_display/index.php?info_center=15&tax_level=4&tax_subject=261&topic_id=1243&level3_id=6213&level4_id=10046

Burn it Bright for All to See!

Mary Beth Evans, Recovery Coordinator — Wed, 21 Dec 2011 10:33:44 +0000

It’s that time of year when many people have financial struggles to make ends meet and wonder how to get food on the table and buy Christmas gifts for our children and clothes to keep them warm. At some point in our lives, we have all watched the flame of hope disappear or start to flicker. When I first went through the Peer Support Training, one of the main things that the trainers discussed was that flame of hope and how it burned out for a lot of people throughout the many years of desperation they had to go through. Looking at my life right now, I think about that flame and how, even though it seems dull at times to me, it has the potential to reach a stronger pigment and will continue to get brighter day by day no matter what my struggles are. Never give up on that flame of hope and remember to shine it through on your life as much as you can!

Taking An Active Role in Self-Management

Mary Beth Evans, Recovery Coordinator — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 15:12:43 +0000

by Mary Beth Evans, CPSS, Northern Lakes CMH Recovery Coordinator

A major part of becoming a self-manager of your chronic illness is knowing when you need help and how to find help. Poor communication is the biggest factor in poor relationships, whether they are between spouses, other family members or friends, coworkers, or doctors and patients. Even in casual relationships, poor communication can cause endless frustration. Even body language can play a factor in good communication. Effective communication comes from within. Thinking before you speak is a huge factor in good communication skills. If you are mad and talk in frustration, you might regret what you say later and lose a support person you need. It’s important to care about your supporters, even when you are upset, because they are the ones who will help you through your rough spots in life.

Even with help from others, you are the only one who can move towards wellness as a self-manager of your illness. Your active involvement in your own wellness can make or break the difference between walking the path towards recovery or standing still. Always remember that if you get off course, get help, get up, and start over again. Everyone makes mistakes. That’s called life and it happens. It does not mean you are not good enough to complete a goal or start over again. It means learn from what went wrong and never quit quitting.

When I find myself “slacking” and not motivated to take on my own life but rather wanting others to do things for me, I tend to take a step back, start working on some goals, and reach out for support. Like I said above, that can be a hard thing to do, but if you start with small goals, you will find it is easier to find the supports you need to endure larger ones later on.

Everyone has the power to be their own self-manager and leader. The time is now to start! Put a smile on your face and start thinking about what you want in life; then slowly create a plan how to get there!

Good luck!

Coloring Outside of the Lines

Mary Beth Evans, Recovery Coordinator — Tue, 26 Apr 2011 16:01:47 +0000

Albert Einstein once said: “Live life to the fullest. You have to color outside the lines once in a while if you want to make your life a masterpiece. Laugh some every day, keep growing, keep dreaming, keep following your heart. The important thing is not to stop questioning.”

When I was a little girl, I remember my parents always telling me to color inside the lines. Now that I’m a mom, I find myself doing the same thing to my children. Looking at this quote, I’m trying to think of the reasoning behind why I ask my kids to do this task and why my parents insisted on it with me. Is it so important to color inside the lines?

Society nowadays calls for kids to be in the “norm”: Go to school, get good grades, follow directions, and eventually go to college (with other things shoved in the middle). I guess I’m starting to re-think having my kids do this diminutive task. So what if they are different? So what if they don’t color in the lines? It makes them more exceptional in a small way on paper, however, looking at the bigger picture, it makes them irreplaceable in the long run if they don’t. Coloring outside of the lines makes them see their world differently. They become an individual who sees and perceives things outside of the box. They become themselves. Something small like this in letting them color however they want, leads them to a world of open possibilities to explore.

My reasoning behind choosing this topic to write about today was because I myself color in the lines way too much. I am who I am and I don’t necessarily want to change all of me, but thinking about it now in this context, it makes me think about the possibilities I could endure if I perhaps started to scribble a little and get messy. Perhaps start to laugh some more every day without letting so much get me down. Keep dreaming of things I might not be able to achieve tomorrow but at least the dream is in my soul and not fading. And, to me, most importantly, keep following my heart; something I have a hard time doing. As Einstein reminds us above, “The important thing is not to stop questioning,” always think of the possibilities that surround us. What can we do today to make tomorrow better?

Mary Beth Evans, CPSS

NLCMH Recovery Coordinator

Tomorrow is a New Day

Mary Beth Evans, Recovery Coordinator — Wed, 09 Mar 2011 16:44:58 +0000

Not that long ago I was reading a book about healthy lifestyles. In my mind I was going to get thinner by exercising and dieting along with eating healthier as well as quitting smoking. I quickly realized that wasn’t just a mouthful to say at once, I had to break it down and do one or the other first. Taking on too much at once was only setting me up for failure. So I started with the no smoking goal.

I had been slowly cutting back without telling anyone for about two months. Then a very close friend of mine had to have unexpected open heart surgery. I smoked double! Although I’m not suggesting that you go out and smoke a ton of cigarettes, what I meant by this is that I felt like a failure because the stress had gotten to me and I had forgotten about my goal. Was I a failure? At the time I thought I was.

One of my friends reminded me, “Tomorrow is another day.” With a lot of support and encouragement, I started over again the next day and I am now down to under a pack of cigarettes a day.

The moral of the story is, no one is perfect. Everyday we battle with different struggles: meeting deadlines at work, cutting down or quitting smoking, losing weight, arguments with our significant other, etc. However, when we wake up the next morning, let the first thought that comes into your mind be, “I can do this today,” and if you can’t, let the second thought be, “Tomorrow is another day.” You are important and so are your goals. Don’t beat yourself up over things that you can’t necessarily change right away. In time, practice makes perfect. Good luck!

–Mary Beth Evans, Recovery Coordinator

Lists Can Help Ease Everyday Stress

Mary Beth Evans, Recovery Coordinator — Mon, 13 Dec 2010 14:59:51 +0000

A very dear friend of mine is into creating lists to help her on a daily basis. Not just the kind of lists you would make to go grocery shopping or a daily routine. The lists she makes are more like how can she improve on her life, what she’s grateful for on a daily basis, and if she’s struggling with some personal problems, the pros and cons of each situation that’s troubling her.

I started to think about these “lists” she makes and how much they have helped her. If you really stop and think about it, how often do you just sit down and write out a list of things you are grateful for? For those of you who do, WOW! Congratulations! When I’m having a hard time making a decision about something that will impact my life, I am now starting to STOP and write down all the pros and cons of what the outcome could/should be. It doesn’t always make up my mind for me, but usually it does help.

Who would have thought that something as simple as a list could be such a great coping skill? When I went on-line to do some research about coping skills, this is one that I didn’t find. I found journaling and lots of other things mentioned, but list making wasn’t one of the more popular ones. I Googled, “making lists for decision in life,” and came up with this: http://www.decision-making-confidence.com/examples-of-decision-making-models.html. What caught my eye more than anything was the opening header that reads: “Choose To Be You – Know What To Do!”

It never hurts to try something once and see if it works. If it doesn’t help after a few days or even a week, try moving on to something else. We all have different ways of coping with our everyday life’s stressors. I hope this helps some as it has helped me tremendously.

Coping Skills for the Holiday Blues

Mary Beth Evans, Recovery Coordinator — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 11:36:33 +0000

It’s at this time of year that we think about the things we have to do in order to get through the holidays. For many of us, our coping skills aren’t up to par the way they should be, so that we think before reacting, or so that we cope better throughout these stressful times. In addition, many of us are having a hard time economically, which can increase the stress we have to deal with. I’d like to take a few minutes to share with you some material (from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the American Psychological Association, and Mental Health America) which I shared with folks awhile back as a refresher to help you with daily coping skills for these holiday blues:

Holiday blues can affect both men and women, young and old. Factors contributing to holiday blues include increased stress and fatigue, unrealistic expectations, too much commercialization, and the inability to be with one’s family. The increased demands of shopping, parties, family reunions, and house guests may also contribute to tension and sadness during the holidays. Common stress reactions during the holidays include headaches, excessive drinking, over-eating or not eating enough, and difficulty sleeping.

A post-holiday let down, resulting from emotional disappointments during the holiday months as well as the physical reactions caused by excess fatigue and stress, may cause holiday blues to continue into the new year.

For some people—particularly those who live in the northern, darker regions—holiday blues may be caused by seasonal affective disorder (SAD). SAD results from fewer hours of sunlight as the days grow shorter during the winter months.

If you are experiencing holiday blues:

Establish realistic goals and expectations for the holiday season, and do not label the holiday season as a time to cure all past problems. The holidays do not prevent sadness or loneliness.
Limit your drinking.
Do not feel obliged to feel festive. Accept your inner experience and do not force yourself to express specific feelings. If you have recently experienced a tragedy, death, or romantic break-up, tell people about your needs.
To relieve holiday stress, know your spending limit and stick to it. Enjoy holiday activities that are free, such as driving around to look at holiday decorations. Go window shopping without buying anything.
Express your feelings to those around you in a constructive, honest, and open way. If you need to confront someone with a problem, begin your sentences with “I feel.”
Recognize that life brings change. The holidays don’t need to be just like they were in the “good old days” to be enjoyable. Develop some new traditions. Celebrate the holidays in a way you have not done before.
Find time for yourself! Don’t spend all your time providing activities for others.

If someone you know is experiencing holiday blues:

Try to involve that person in holiday activities, but don’t be forceful.
Be a good listener. If people express suicidal thoughts or feel depressed, hopeless, or worthless, be supportive. Let them know you are there for them and are willing to help them seek professional help. Never issue challenges or dares.
Familiarize yourself with resources such as mental health centers, counseling centers, and hotlines.
If the depressed person is chronically ill, express that you understand that the holidays do not cure the illness.
Be aware that holidays can be difficult for people, especially when reality doesn’t measure up to their expectations. Help them establish what is realistic and what is not.

Perhaps it will help you to remind yourself:
Flexible things don’t break!

Changing Seasons – Changing Moods

Mary Beth Evans, Recovery Coordinator — Thu, 04 Nov 2010 05:00:07 +0000

When summer comes to an end and all that’s left of the warm wind are falling leaves and brisk air, it sometimes becomes hard to keep our moods in tact. I have been told various times that I suffer from something called S.A.D., which means Seasonal Affective Disorder. This is a condition that is associated with symptoms of depression, lethargy, and fatigue, to name a few. My doctor has told me that this is because of an increased production in melatonin, which is a sleep-inducing hormone. A friend of mine was told that her S.A.D. was caused by a lack of sunlight. Only an experienced health care professional can diagnose your personal situation and come up with the best treatment.

However, if you are like me and many other people in the world and experience seasonal mood changes that are mild, there are plenty of steps you can take to try to lift your spirits. These are not in place of making sure your health care professional knows how you are feeling; rather, these are some coping skills to help:

Exercise – it helps relieve both stress and anxiety as well as improve your wellness.
Get out of the house more – go to a friend’s house and play cards or do a puzzle. This is not only a fun thing to do but it also provides moral support for your S.A.D. feelings/troubles.
Open the window blinds – maximize the sun when it’s out and open the blinds on sunny days.
Change Negative thoughts into Positive Thoughts.
Take time for yourself – continue to take care of yourself and your wellness. Even if this means getting a little extra sleep, taking an extra bath, reading a book, or even just relaxing by taking time away from everything else around you.
Follow your treatments – If your doctor is aware of your disorder, make sure and follow all of his/her recommended treatments. Be sure to keep all scheduled appointments and keep a mood journal so you can show them what you have been doing and how it has/has not helped you.

Once SAD is diagnosed, it is usually easy to treat. Relax, take a deep breath, and know that you are NOT alone. There are millions of people who suffer from this same thing and are being treated daily while improving their symptoms. Remember to laugh, take time for you, and also to talk to someone for the emotional support. Close friends can help just as well as a therapist just by being around.

Using Social Media to Connect with Friends and Family

Mary Beth Evans, Recovery Coordinator — Mon, 25 Oct 2010 10:05:21 +0000

In our October 12 post, we shared Marty Raaymakers’ information on Making Friends: People Maps. This has gotten me thinking about my own situation. A lot of people in today’s society use the ever so popular and growing web site called Facebook. I happen to be one of those people and lately I’ve been grateful that today’s society has such a thing to offer. I’ve connected with people that I haven’t seen since I was in grade school back in the suburbs of Detroit. Since I have connected to Facebook, I’m finding more and more out about who I am as a person through interacting with folks that I know now as my family. Without them I would not be where I am today. To date I have over 400 friends who definitely don’t all fit on my people map. They are friends and acquaintances but a very few have become my family. They listen to me and provide support and acceptance for my right and wrong decisions. Part of Recovery to me is being accepted for who I am.

A long time ago I thought that the only supports I had were the ones telling me all the things I did wrong. Through interactive technology I have been more than motivated to not only listen to my friends/family tell me what I’ve done wrong, but to accept me for those things and encourage me how to make it right.

Whoever and wherever you are, there are supports out there for you. Even if it’s not through Facebook, it’s there. It’s not easy and it can be tough, but being open-minded and not putting negative judgments on others will definitely help. Please take a look at Marty’s video on People Maps because it’s really an awesome way to reach out and help yourself make friends and connections. You matter to someone. Everyone does. Reach out and make friends. The first step is taking one step at a time.

– Mary Beth Evans, CPSS, NLCMH Recovery Coordinator